Defining Moments
Dr. Phil says that we have a few defining moments in our lives. These moments or experiences are what form us into the person we become. These defining moments can be big, small, good or even bad, never the less we allow them to lay the groundwork for how we live our lives. I had one of these moments the other day.
As you all know by now, food was my drug, so when I used to struggle with something I would immediately turn to food to help me ease the pain or avoid the issue at hand. Last week I was having a terrible day, well week really everything that could go wrong seemed like it did and I finally broke down! I was at work in Bar Harbor and realizing that I was not in the right state of mind to give a good treatment to my very deserving clients, I knew I just had to get my head back into the game before they showed up.
My first thought was...I need to go walk this off...so I walked directly out the door and started walking, the faster I walked feeling the cool ocean air on my face, the better I felt. I walked down Cottage Street onto Main...and immediately it hit me! The sweet smell of Ben and Bills!! At that moment I just stopped on the sidewalk and stared at the store, I could not believe what I had done!
Last September when I felt this way, I would have got in the car, drove down and bought a huge slab of fudge and ate it real fast on my way back to the office so no one could see. But no, not this time, this time my mind immediately told me to walk it off, get some exercise. I had adopted new habits and ways of dealing with life's ups and downs! I was subconsciously treating myself with respect...I automatically leaned toward loving behavior...without even having to work at it!! This was a defining moment for me, it was the first time that I had conformation that I had moved forward in my life. I was not the same helpless person that was standing inside the doors of Ben and Bills less than a year ago, this time I was the strong, self respecting person standing on the outside with a great big grin :)
With tears of joy in my eyes and my huge grin, I walked right by and on the way back through it was even easier to keep moving because with every step I knew that I was walking towards a life that was whole.
For all you stress eaters out there, don't give up, take baby steps and give yourself big pats on the back when an accomplishment is made, and when you stumble do not give yourself an emotional beating. Every day it will get easier I promise!!! YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
My Long Lost Friend
My Long Lost Friend
I drove into the parking lot and just sat there with the motor running, my palms sweaty, stomach in knots and fidgety as all hell. I left the car running so I could make my quick get away, because all I could think about was how much I wanted to put my foot to the floor and get away from this place as fast as possible. How could a place that my life once revolved around turn into my biggest nightmare? I used to wake up and run there just as fast as my feet would carry me, it was my favorite place in the world...but today I was petrified to walk through the doors. Where was I? The GYM!
Some of you who read this will just laugh and say "whatever". But many others will know exactly where I am coming from. When you walk in you are worried...everyone is looking at me...I know they are thinking"why are you bothering lady!". And...my butt...my butt is juggling while I am on the elliptical...why do they put the machines facing the wall?? That means everyone behind you is watching you jiggle?? And the mirrors...excuse me!! Are they really necessary?
All these crazy thoughts go through your head, so much so that you never really work to your full potential because you are so busy worrying about what everyone else is thinking about you. You find that YOU are the one in fact staring at everyone else, because you are intimidated by the "skinny mini" running on the treadmill. Am I right? I am here to tell you, they don't give a shit about you and your insecurities! Trust me when I say this, they are here to keep their bodies healthy and if they are working to their full potential they sure as the hell aren't worried about what you are doing! You are the last thing on their mind! So in the end you have tortured yourself for an hour with useless negative thoughts!
Why do we do this to ourselves? Two reasons.
1. Fear of change...We are looking for an excuse to stay right where we are, it takes courage to change, even if we desperately need it, down deep we know all the wonderful things that can come from change, but in the end we choose to not take the chance. We choose to stay right where we are because it is comfortable and we fear what change will bring. Sounds strange doesn't it? We choose a tattered life when we could have one that is whole. It is necessary to break this cycle and find the courage to make the change and sometimes it starts with something as trivial as walking into the gym.
2. Rejection of society...We put to much emphasis on how others see us, when what we really have to remember is...we are the ones who tell others "what" they are seeing. They mirror the image of what we are thinking! Whether we realize it or not, if we are insecure then people will see insecure, if we feel fat and frumpy that's what others will see. On the other hand if you feel vibrant and full of energy that is exactly what others will see. We tell people how to see us. If we spent more time focusing on feeling better about ourselves and less on who we thought people perceived us to be then the problem would be solved.
So back to my story...I took a deep breath and walked in through the door, put my headphones on and walked into a very crowded room of people on the machines. I thought for sure that they would all stare at me...but what I observed was something very different. The room was not full of "skinny mini's" it was full of ordinary people, people who were there for the same reasons I was. I immediately jumped onto a piece of equipment and worked to my full potential, then moved to the next piece and then the next piece all while remembering why I used to love the gym. Without finding the courage to walk through the door I would never have reconnected with my long lost friend...the gym;)
I challenge you today find courage to do something that puts a knot in your stomach just thinking about it, something that you know would benefit you but you just don't dare. Step on the scale...go to the gym...say yes to the blind date...ride that roller coaster you have always been afraid of...do some sort of public speaking, there's has to be something that requires you to tap into your box of courage. I promise you the high you get when you break through that barrier is way better than the feelings of shame you currently live with every single day for never trying.
I drove into the parking lot and just sat there with the motor running, my palms sweaty, stomach in knots and fidgety as all hell. I left the car running so I could make my quick get away, because all I could think about was how much I wanted to put my foot to the floor and get away from this place as fast as possible. How could a place that my life once revolved around turn into my biggest nightmare? I used to wake up and run there just as fast as my feet would carry me, it was my favorite place in the world...but today I was petrified to walk through the doors. Where was I? The GYM!
Some of you who read this will just laugh and say "whatever". But many others will know exactly where I am coming from. When you walk in you are worried...everyone is looking at me...I know they are thinking"why are you bothering lady!". And...my butt...my butt is juggling while I am on the elliptical...why do they put the machines facing the wall?? That means everyone behind you is watching you jiggle?? And the mirrors...excuse me!! Are they really necessary?
All these crazy thoughts go through your head, so much so that you never really work to your full potential because you are so busy worrying about what everyone else is thinking about you. You find that YOU are the one in fact staring at everyone else, because you are intimidated by the "skinny mini" running on the treadmill. Am I right? I am here to tell you, they don't give a shit about you and your insecurities! Trust me when I say this, they are here to keep their bodies healthy and if they are working to their full potential they sure as the hell aren't worried about what you are doing! You are the last thing on their mind! So in the end you have tortured yourself for an hour with useless negative thoughts!
Why do we do this to ourselves? Two reasons.
1. Fear of change...We are looking for an excuse to stay right where we are, it takes courage to change, even if we desperately need it, down deep we know all the wonderful things that can come from change, but in the end we choose to not take the chance. We choose to stay right where we are because it is comfortable and we fear what change will bring. Sounds strange doesn't it? We choose a tattered life when we could have one that is whole. It is necessary to break this cycle and find the courage to make the change and sometimes it starts with something as trivial as walking into the gym.
2. Rejection of society...We put to much emphasis on how others see us, when what we really have to remember is...we are the ones who tell others "what" they are seeing. They mirror the image of what we are thinking! Whether we realize it or not, if we are insecure then people will see insecure, if we feel fat and frumpy that's what others will see. On the other hand if you feel vibrant and full of energy that is exactly what others will see. We tell people how to see us. If we spent more time focusing on feeling better about ourselves and less on who we thought people perceived us to be then the problem would be solved.
So back to my story...I took a deep breath and walked in through the door, put my headphones on and walked into a very crowded room of people on the machines. I thought for sure that they would all stare at me...but what I observed was something very different. The room was not full of "skinny mini's" it was full of ordinary people, people who were there for the same reasons I was. I immediately jumped onto a piece of equipment and worked to my full potential, then moved to the next piece and then the next piece all while remembering why I used to love the gym. Without finding the courage to walk through the door I would never have reconnected with my long lost friend...the gym;)
I challenge you today find courage to do something that puts a knot in your stomach just thinking about it, something that you know would benefit you but you just don't dare. Step on the scale...go to the gym...say yes to the blind date...ride that roller coaster you have always been afraid of...do some sort of public speaking, there's has to be something that requires you to tap into your box of courage. I promise you the high you get when you break through that barrier is way better than the feelings of shame you currently live with every single day for never trying.
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Mind over Body or Body over Mind???
Mind over Body or Body over Mind???
I remember the first day I started to exercise on this 365 day journey, my mind had a clear vision of what I was about to accomplish but when my body was put in motion...it had a very different opinion of what could realistically be accomplished . Each and every day I would work my body as hard as I possibly could, all while my mind racing with that "vision" of where I was going to be. (some would argue that this "vision" was unrealistic, but not me! I continued to believe" Some days I wanted to throw in the towel, I felt like my body was standing in the way of my mind! But I didn't...I envisioned a body and mind that were whole. Every day I grew closer and closer to that goal until one day I felt it, I was on my morning walk, and for the first time I felt as though my legs were "new" they were exactly as they were suppose to be. Strong, long, fast and full of strength. When my mind said "go faster" ...they went faster! I knew at that moment that all my physical obstacles had been lifted and for the first time my body had caught up to my mind.
With that said, it can be just the opposite too. Are you one of those people who's mind is standing in the way of their body? Have you ever done something physical and was thoroughly shocked that you accomplished it? This was because your mind was standing in the way of your body, your body knew all along that it could be accomplished, but your mind did not allow yourself to believe. So tell me, is your mind in the way of your body? Or is your body in the way of your mind?
It really does not matter either way, because all you have to do is believe in both your mind and body and all the doubt will fall away and you will soon find that your mind and body are moving in line with one another and let me tell you that is an amazing feeling that will bring tears to your eyes;)
(I had to remind myself of this lesson as recovery from surgery can be very frustrating!!!)
Hugs to you all!!!
I remember the first day I started to exercise on this 365 day journey, my mind had a clear vision of what I was about to accomplish but when my body was put in motion...it had a very different opinion of what could realistically be accomplished . Each and every day I would work my body as hard as I possibly could, all while my mind racing with that "vision" of where I was going to be. (some would argue that this "vision" was unrealistic, but not me! I continued to believe" Some days I wanted to throw in the towel, I felt like my body was standing in the way of my mind! But I didn't...I envisioned a body and mind that were whole. Every day I grew closer and closer to that goal until one day I felt it, I was on my morning walk, and for the first time I felt as though my legs were "new" they were exactly as they were suppose to be. Strong, long, fast and full of strength. When my mind said "go faster" ...they went faster! I knew at that moment that all my physical obstacles had been lifted and for the first time my body had caught up to my mind.
With that said, it can be just the opposite too. Are you one of those people who's mind is standing in the way of their body? Have you ever done something physical and was thoroughly shocked that you accomplished it? This was because your mind was standing in the way of your body, your body knew all along that it could be accomplished, but your mind did not allow yourself to believe. So tell me, is your mind in the way of your body? Or is your body in the way of your mind?
It really does not matter either way, because all you have to do is believe in both your mind and body and all the doubt will fall away and you will soon find that your mind and body are moving in line with one another and let me tell you that is an amazing feeling that will bring tears to your eyes;)
(I had to remind myself of this lesson as recovery from surgery can be very frustrating!!!)
Hugs to you all!!!
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